to whom it may concern.

"i miss you, but i haven't met you..."

This song by The Civil Wars has been on replay for me lately.

A beautiful song, characterizing the longing of waiting for "the one"...the "Dear Whoever You May Be..." and waiting patiently for timing. (sigh...)

Tonight, after all the long stems of red roses have been submerged in tall vases of water and heart-shaped boxes of half-eaten chocolates are tossed aside, another Valentine's Day comes to a close. And with it's passing, some impressions and thoughts are left on my heart.

An Internet ad popped up on my screen earlier today. For one of those Internet dating websites (insert disclaimer - I'm not saying I think people shouldn't use Internet dating sites...that's another topic for another time. disclaimer ended. ha.) A Christian one, apparently. And it boldly proclaimed, "Sign up today for a free profile! Find God's match for you - Mr. Right won't wait forever!!"

Mr. Right won't wait forever?? I thought God was sovereign? I thought He said in His Word, "For I know the plans I have for you....plans to prosper and not to harm you. To give you hope and a future." -Jer. 29:11. That He tells His children to trust Him, to rest in His timing. I thought He tells us that fear trips us up, but when we trust in Him, we are safe (Proverbs 29:25.) And that He is the God who "opens doors no one can shut and shuts doors no one can open" (Revelation 3:7)

I thought about this today. And mid-afternoon, found myself wandering over to my bookcase, dusting off one of my favorite old poetry books.

In it, there's a poem I love. My eyes fell upon it again today, remembering when I first read it about 10 years ago. Since then, I've prayed it along with the sweet author:

"Dear God, I prayed, all unafraid

(as we're inclined to do)

I do not need a handsome man

but let him be like You;

I do not need one big and strong

nor yet so very tall,

nor need he be some genius,

or wealthy, Lord, at all;

but let his head be high, dear God,

and let his eye be clear,

his shoulders straight, what e'er his state,

what e'er his earthly sphere;

and let his face have character,

a ruggedness of soul,

and let his whole life show, dear God,

a singleness of goal;

then when he comes

(as he will come)

with quiet eyes aglow,

I'll understand that he's the man

I prayed for long ago."

The young woman who prayed this? Ruth Bell Graham. The Lord answered her prayer. And (I imagine) exceeded her expectations. On August 13, 1943 she married Billy Graham. The evangelist who would become one of the most admired and respected Christian leaders in the world. The man who preached the Gospel in person to more people than any other person in history. The man who committed to guard against even the appearance of wrongdoing and so promised to never be alone with any woman besides Ruth. The man who said, "I saw her walking down the road towards me and I couldn't help but stare at her as she walked. She looked at me and our eyes met and I felt that she was definitely the woman I wanted to marry." Ruth once said, "he wanted to please the Lord more than any other man I'd ever met." (Needless to say, she is one of my role models. Her book of poetry is called "Sitting By My Laughing Fire" and it is lovely)

{photo source, information source}

Her faith and trust, her submission to God's will and way. And the way in which her faithful God brought into her life a wonderful man - the one she prayed for (and more!) Her line, "as he will surely come" - how small, yet how full of faith.

My dears - if you feel that post lonely-Valentine's Day urge to set up an account on some dating website, call and ask your married friends to set you up on a blind date, friend request hot guys on Facebook, reluctantly say "yes" to a guy who's pressuring you (one you know is not good for you...) or just pace around the house, wringing your hands while trying to think of some way to meet the right one... wait. And remember something with me -

"We haven't even seen a God like ours

who acts on behalf of

the one who waits for Him."

-Isaiah 64:4

"Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed."

-Proverbs 16:3

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
and He will make your paths straight."
-Proverbs 3:5-6

"We humans keep brainstorming options and plans,

but God's purpose prevails."

-Proverbs 19:21

(the msg)

As my friends and I used to say in college whenever tempted to pursue a guy outlandishly or make something happen on our own: "God does not bless manipulation." I've found (through experience, unfortunately!) God's timing is best and when we try to make things happen and force things to go our way, we usually end up disappointed and unsatisfied. And this goes for more than just relationships, too.

In all the areas of life - relationships, romance, careers, ministry, things we want...it can be tempting to manipulate or make things happen in a way that speeds up the process, makes things easier for us. We may want something so badly we can barely stand it. Slowly counting down the days til we know the name of the one we will spend the rest of our life in love with. Waiting for the perfect job to come along. Aching for the dream to come true, the plan to be fulfilled. Yet, perhaps the Lord wants us to wait. To have faith, to pray. Like Ruth Graham did. To be faithful in the small things. Instead of rushing around, scheming, planning and trying to make things happen.